ella turenne

everyone should go out and read the alchemist by paolo cohelo.  my girl jenn "juniper superstar" armas kept telling me about it until i finally buckled down and read it. i've read it twice now.  its an incredible piece of literature.  it follows the journey of a young man trying to find his personal legend...his treasure...his reason for living.  it takes him on a journey that tests him, allows him to find love and makes him quesiton everything he knows and believes.

what is so profound about this book is this idea: "if one really wants to fullfill his/her personal legend, the whole universe will conspire to help make that happen." i really believe that is so true.  you have to believe that a goal is obtainable for you even make your way towards achieving it.  finding my personal legend has taken some time....i think i've figured it out and i also think that - at least for me - its not one thing.  i think i am supposed to make change in my community.  i believe i have that responsibility.  and right now, i am blessed to have a job which lets me do just that.  i also believe i'm supposed to do some of that through art.  i've realized art cannot be void from my life.  its just not an option.

i've reflected over the past several years about how lucky i was to have a set of mentors who really helped shape who i am.  from high school on, these people were tough and believed in me to their very core.  one pushed me to really better myself as a performer.  another allowed me to merge my new found awareness for social justice with art.  yet another told me that wasting my talent was like pissing on god (i never did that again!).  and finally, another told me to get my act together (no pun intended)...that there were many things in this world i could do as a smart young woman.  he said if there was anything else i could do in the world besides being an artist, i should do it because you should only be an artist if you can't picture yourself doing anything else.  thats why i say "art or die."  art is survival.  edwidge daniticat says it should be "a passion - one that won't be denied, that won't let you sleep, that's almost like breathing."  (essence magazine)  since i was little, its been the only thing i can think about.  when i went to boston to pursue my graduate degree, i thought i could supress all that, but it just kept coming back to me.  so finally i realized i just had to stop fighting it and go with the flow...

peace

ella